Campus Observatory

Overlabeled.

2011-02-11T20:04:00.000-07:00

"Excuse me, I'm looking for 101N in this building."

"Here you go."

Campus Police

2010-12-25T21:45:00.000-07:00

The other day I lost my keys on campus, so called the campus police to come open my car for me. They were there within a few minutes, though it took the technician awhile to work on the door....finally he called for some back-up who had each side of the car open in 30 seconds. I was grateful for the help, even though I still couldn't find my keys after I got in. At least I was able to sit in my car to wait for a spare to arrive instead of standing in the cold for 45 minutes.

In general, I've never felt threatened on campus, but there are blue light posts with emergency phones to call them. They'll help you get into your car, or if you feel unsafe they'll escort you to your car.

Emily's Rainbow

2010-11-24T17:16:00.000-07:00

When this spray-painted rainbow on several large pieces of butcher paper appeared in the hallway of one of our university buildings a couple of weeks ago, it got my attention. I have no idea who made it or why it is there.

I do know, however, whose rainbow it is:

Research.

2010-11-06T17:56:00.000-06:00

While doing research for a paper, this article came up in my search results.

"The Potato in Spain during the Late 16th Century" published in Economic Botany.

As a friend said, some people will do anything for a Thesis.

Scholarship Awards Banquets

2010-11-03T18:27:00.000-06:00

During Spring semester this year, I attended a departmental scholarship awards ceremony for Classics in Language and Literature. We met in a small conference room, had a one page program and after the ceremony, had pizza, drinks and cookies. (I might add the pizza was from the local eatery, very tasty)

A few weeks ago, I attended a departmental scholarship awards ceremony for Engineering. We met in the tower of the football stadium with a fantastic view of the city lights. The program was 25 pages. After a three course catered dinner with water and punch, there was a reading of all the scholarship recipients and tribute to the excellence of the program.

I wonder who has more funding.

Gold Shoes

2010-11-03T18:13:00.000-06:00

On my way out of one class, I frequently see a small, gray-haired woman walking in the opposite direction. She always has her hair pulled back, and is clutching her books tightly to her chest. A few days ago I saw her, wearing gold shoes. Awesome.

HYPR

2010-05-18T15:56:00.000-06:00

A sign posted on the doors of the ladies locker room:

"NO HOT WATER UNTIL 05/21"

Of course, it is now my routine to shower there after work-out classes. It hasn't been too bad, though near the end it feels like my head was dunked in a frozen lake.

The ladies locker room is actually quite convenient, with towels you can check out with just your ID card, showers (with curtains, thank goodness), hair dryers and plenty of room. Also, it is quite warm in there, to make up for the freezing shower. Though, a note on the shower curtains: They are just wide enough to cover the shower opening, if the material was completely stretched out. But, as shower curtains go, the curtain is slightly waved. Luckily there is no one else in there at the time I am.

Beautiful.

2010-02-12T12:36:00.001-07:00

The Ladies restroom in OSH displays a long mirror above the three sinks. Someone placed a sticker top and center of the mirror. Must be Valentine's Day.

Doughnut Chairs.

2009-11-20T11:38:00.004-07:00

With the new remodel of the library, new furniture was part of the improvements. The old desk chairs, arm-chairs and couches were acceptable and functional, though definitely showing wear. Now, the new chairs at all of the computers are ones that you can sit in without feeling like you're sitting in a chair for hours on end. But what I am so keenly interested in are the new "arm chairs". I dubbed them the "doughnut chairs". The basic concept is a half-sphere, with a slightly pushed out bottom and back with cushions to seat a human. On a tour of the library, it was revealed that the designer calls them "The Womb." One full grown man could easily curl in a fetal position and fall asleep (the down fall of studying in these chairs: sleeping comes easily). Each chair is built to withstand decades of wear, costing near $3,000 (yes a comma in the price) each.

We don't skimp here when it comes to a student's education (or comfort).

A Letter.

2009-10-23T13:42:00.002-06:00

Dear Math Tutoring Center,

Get more tutors who know Stats.
If you do know Stats, please help me to do the problem correctly.
If you come to help me with a problem, please wait until I understand. Explaining a concept and walking away does not count.

Sincerely,
A Stats student.

Parking Meters

2009-09-15T11:14:00.005-06:00

On a lovely, sunny afternoon in September, I parked my car near a large lawn on campus where a friend loaded his bike into the back of my car. We discovered a frisbee. We both had things to do that afternoon so I loaded the parking meter with some change, enough for about 26 (do I really remember that?) minutes. Of course, once one is involved in a game such as this, time fades away. I realized we were there considerably longer than planned and paid for, but with no parking attendants in sight, we kept playing. Finally, our arms exhausted, we wandered back up the hill to the car, where lo and behold, there was a man on a bike in a uniform, looking at my flashing red "EXPIRED" meter. As I approached the car and opened the door, he said to me "You know you're meter ran out." My relpy, "I do now" and shut the door.

More such meters line the restaurants near campus. The row of parking spaces was empty, and I pulled into the last space. Collecting change, I walked to the meter. The slot for my space read:

and the slot was jammed full of coins. I used the next meter over to pay for my parking.

First Day Drool

2009-08-24T11:32:00.002-06:00

When one has the chance to peek into the full and active classrooms of others, especially on the first day of class, there is almost 100% of the time, a uniform expression on the faces of the students. Stupified "what-the-heck-am-I-getting-myself-into-and-paying-for-it", mouth open (or at least the jaw is apart if the lips are closed) blank look at the teacher. To these people: I know. Take luck.

Driving Machines

2009-08-13T12:05:00.002-06:00

Walking through a college parking lot can be quite the museum. Clunkers that are being held together with team memorabilia, scooters, every once in a while a lucky student with a European car, but most are just cars that have 7-10 years on them already that run well enough for transportation, naps and restaurant seats. One thing they all have in common - Dirt. My car is no exception. Out all night next to sprinklers, the morning brings nice pollen coat of fuzz. With papers, exams and work (to pay for that car) the last thing on a student's mind is the outward condition of their car. Every car in sight had water spots, road dirt, or pollen. We should look at this as the way the rising generation is contributing to the environment by saving water and not polluting the ground with cleansing chemicals.

All Brands of Nerdiness

2009-05-24T16:50:00.004-06:00

Post Written By James Dixon

It takes all kinds to make the world. I learned that a lot in Germany, and I'm still learning that here in Utah. I also found out that the more people you get to be around, the more likely you are to see and understand that. Singing in institute choir has provided one such opportunity. As soon as it was publicized that we were going to be singing in General Conference, the flood gates opened, and everyone and their dog came out to rehearse.

I remember one such rehearsal where all the choirs in the valley meet together at one time. We had around 400 people in that rehearsal, so it was very warm, noisy, and everyone was getting a little impatient. While the director was working with the women in the choir, I took the opportunity to stretch and survey my fellow tenors. Sitting directly behind me was a tenor who looked like he could be fresh out of high school. He was very intently working on a project, and after some careful observation, I could see he was working on a cross-stitch. But this wasn't any cross-stitch. This was a cross-stitch of a Pokemon. I started jumping to conclusions about the level of nerdiness that this kid, now in college, must be at. I then reassured myself that maybe he was making it for a younger brother, and thought, "gosh, what a nice guy." Then he looked up at me with his bottle rim glasses and gave me a smile that will go down in the annals of my memory for time and all eternity as one of the nerdiest smiles I think I've ever gotten. There was no longer any need to jump to conclusions. The cross-stitch was for him, and only him. I smiled back, trying to suppress a laugh, and then turned around and tried to laugh as silently and with as little movement as possible. Have you ever tried to do that? It's painful. But you know, probably the most painful and frightening part of the experience is, for a split second right when I saw his cross-stitch, the name of the specific Pokemon he was needling came flashing into mind. I thought "Hey, that's a Vulpix."

I learned that it really does take all kinds to make the world. But be careful what you think or say... you might just be one of them.

Cold Season.

2009-04-07T10:23:00.003-06:00

A university campus should also be known as a breeding ground for germs. Students feel they have to be in class, though they are seriously ill.

It should also be noted that students are poor, and it is not unusual to see a long stretch of toilet paper emerge from a student's pocket rather than tissues.

EEBO.

2009-03-26T16:04:00.002-06:00

Early English Books Online.

The type used for the letter "s" used in the early days of the printing press looks much like an "f". (though only in the intervocalic or interconsonatal instances) When one reads through this type, the first impression is that these people spoke with a lisp. "..in moft pointf of ufuful knowledge."

Note: Is there a word that means a letter inside a word, that applies for both interconsonatal and intervocalic? What about for the letter at the end of a word?

Novels.

2009-03-26T15:53:00.002-06:00

As I was slaving away this morning, finishing a paper that was due later that day and simultaneously contemplating the other assignment due Monday, as well as the Annotated Bibliography that is due Tuesday, and remembering the things within the *other* category of tasks to accomplish before these due dates, I glanced over at a man in a chair reading a book. Closer inspection of the book revealed that it was most likely NOT a homework assignment, but a simple, pleasureful, fun, treat for the eyes, relaxing read, fantasy novel.

Either he's one of the luckiest guys on campus that has a) no homework or b) finished homework with no additional studying to do or c) a guy who knows who to procrastinate properly.

You know people are in your office when you aren't, when....

2009-02-25T09:55:00.002-07:00

The full candy dish now only has 6 pieces left.
Papers that were in your box, now are outside of it.
The paper from the printer now sits on your desk and the printer drawer is open
The photo is lying flat instead of standing.
There is a nearly empty bottle of Organic Raw Kombucha sitting next to the mailboxes, that obviously wasn't there before.
A power strip that was once on the floor, is now on the desk.

WEB

2009-02-19T16:05:00.002-07:00

In the WEB building, there is a staircase on the south-west corner. Between the 4th and 1st floors of this staircase, is a plastic tube full of water.

I'm guessing this has something to do with the earthquake monitors that are on the 8th floor of the same building.

Cow.

2009-02-19T16:04:00.001-07:00

Above the TRAX line near the hospital, there is a full color statue of a cow.

Student Union

2009-02-03T16:12:00.002-07:00

For those who infrequently visit the Student Union building would do well to in the near future. The Union houses the following, but is not strictly limited to:

Jukebox (There's even a Radio Disney CD in there)
Pool table.
Big Screen TV.
Food. Food. Food.
Ping Pong table.
Bowling.
Quarter Basketball machine.

Plus all the things you'd expect, like a computer lab, a totally rad bathroom (see here), discount tickets for Lagoon, movies, sports events, offices, and a big wood floored dance room with a chandelier.

To MFA Applicants

2009-01-05T12:42:00.002-07:00

Dear Applicants,

If you want to be accepted into the Film Program it might help if:

A) You sent all your letters of recommendation in.
B) You put an application with your DVD sample.
C) Sent all the requirements in ON TIME.

If you have made it this far, graduated from an institution with a Bachelors Degree, one would hope you had learned to follow instructions, and be on time for deadlines. But one can only hope.

Walking in a Winter Wonder-accident-pron-Land

2008-12-16T11:17:00.002-07:00

To ensure safety of all humans on campus, the University has offered a page of tips. Directly quoted from the web page. May I say, common sense anyone?

Be Safe

Plan extra time on your schedule to prevent being in a rush. Most accidents occur due to inattention or being in a hurry.
Remove snows from shoes before entering any building.
Always use a handrail when climbing up and down stairs.
Always use handrail when getting in and out of buildings, vehicles or public transportation.
Wear footwear with traction, consider Yax Trax or something similar.

Be Smart

Walk at a slower pace.
Stay on designated walkways.
Watch and avoid slippery surfaces.

Be Seen

Wait for vehicles to make a complete stop before crossing the road.
Wear visible clothing especially at night or during heavy snow.

If you fall relax and try to fall as limply as possible. Avoid using your arms to stop your fall. (Does anyone else see an image of a rag doll? Seriously, the first thing I think when I slip is "oh crap!" not "oh, I should relax, just like in the bath...")

Driving a Vehicle

Avoid driving with snow "peep holes".
Make the time to completely clear the snow and ice off your vehicle. Start from the roof, all windows, hood, trunk, turn signals, head and taillights, mirrors and fenders.
Leave sufficient distance between your vehicle and the vehicle in front of you to allow manueverability and avoid possible collision. Give enough space so you can stop sooner
Slow down. Roads may be slippery due to black ice.
Avoid making abrupt lane changes.
Avoid any distractions when driving such as using your cellphone.

According to the Federal Highway Administration's national statistics, an average of 232 pedestrians are injured each day while a pedestrian is killed or injured every 7 minutes.

Umm, thanks. I'll do my best.

The "Bells" - Part 2

2008-11-10T10:08:00.005-07:00

Today, the "bells" were ringing at nine-thirty, as a song. Now, I've heard that the school down south plays church hymns with their real, legit, you can actually see and touch, bells. Is this in attempts to be "as cool"? The song that was playing was a familiar tune, though I couldn't tell you what it was. Laughing to myself at the attempt of music, suddenly the song stopped abruptly, right in the middle. Maybe someone was just too annoyed and threw something at the speaker.

Enthusiastic Professors

2008-10-01T11:52:00.002-06:00

Today in class, a professor was describing the Greek language. With her reading glasses in hand, she waved her arm...and you can guess what happened. The spectacles flew across the room, landing in two pieces. The class was sympathetic, but she just laughed, and walked back to the table and picked up new pair she had picked up the night before.

Random Creativity

2008-09-23T10:19:00.004-06:00

This particular display of artwork bears no signature, no explanation, no hint of purpose. It just appeared one day, and has stayed there for over a week. Slowly, the weather has modified it, and now the middle hangs low to the ground. Kudos to whoever was daring enough to make the attempt. Again, I'm not aware of the point of the display...but that's art right? To boggle one's mind, bring you out of the box, and make you wonder why someone would sew random shirts together and hang them from a trellis....

Bathrooms - Remodeling

2008-09-23T10:13:00.005-06:00

Many of the bathrooms on campus resemble ancient dungeons. Slowly, the management has seen fit to make-over the lair-like toilet rooms. One particular remodel merited the switch of male/female rooms. To make sure no one walks into the wrong room by habit, they posted handy signs that really make one notice....and wonder. (Click to enlarge for effect)

Smoke

2008-09-04T10:27:00.003-06:00

At a University you would expect those who inhabit the campus to be people who use their brains. Aka - rational and intelligent. Yet, there are cigarette receptacles at nearly every entry to a building (though I vaguely remember the music building steps being devoid of such containers. hint?). Men and women alike walk around with their fiery lollipops. The smell is atrocious. The thought that they can't possibly be aware of the damage they are inflicting upon their bodies, other wise they wouldn't get 10 feet near a light of a cigarette. I have heard people say that smoking is a stress reliever. That need I can understand. Perhaps we should sponsor a daily concert by those from the music building. Music that is fun, yet relaxing. Get people's minds off their immense load of schoolwork. Maybe these kids missed the day in health class that discussed the effects of smoking to ones body. Maybe they don't ever watch TV or listen to the radio to hear the advertisements against the bad habit of smoking. Maybe these are the people who have poor peripheral vision and can't see the WARNING signs at the bottom of magazine ads for cigarettes. Maybe these people have short term memory loss....

A Table for Choir

2008-08-28T14:51:00.003-06:00

On a more personal note, there once was something called the "Choir Lunch Table." Those who were involved in the Concert Choir at the Institute of Religion are familiar with this term. This phenomenon was created before my time, so here I give only a personal account, not a complete history. (Those who are more familiar with the pre-2006 events are welcome to add) Rehearsals were held each day at 10:45am. Those who were able then flocked to the Deli to grab cheap, yet delicious lunch items. A round table was chosen, and chairs were smashed together to fit each and every soul. You would quickly get to know those who were unfamiliar simply by being nearly smashed legs and arms together as you ate. Many times a greater number than room allowed would come, and then formed what we dubbed "orbiters." There was always room for one more at the Choir Lunch Table.

Sometimes, one choirman would find a table before the rest arrived. Other students at the Institute would ask to sit at the table with the choirman, and of course be welcome. Within five minutes, the poor student's eyes would widen when 8 or more people would join them at the table, all chatting and laughing. One was never lonely with a choir group!

Sadly, during the past year the lunch table diminished in popularity. The size of the choir shrank, some graduate and moved on, or were simply occupied elsewhere. On occasion the table was resurrected to it's full glory.

This year, the rehearsal time has moved to the late afternoon, and the tables now sit bare and lonely during lunch. The mixes of uneaten food, the explosion of laughter, the tall stacks of garbage that would sit in the middle of the table, and the instant, yet increasing and deep bonds of friendship around the choir table will be greatly missed. The memory lives on in the hearts of those who were once members of the infamous Choir Lunch Table.

Art Building

2008-07-27T10:48:00.007-06:00

The art building. A place that supposedly harbors the creative students of campus. You'd think the creative minds would require a place more suited to enhancing the vibes of creation. Or maybe this is a foreshadowing of the type of life an artist will live. Dark, dank and forlorn...

Grammar isn't their best subject. Or maybe it's a style to be "different"....

This is on an elevator down button. Seems to be the typical mindset of artists...

Bathrooms - Unexpected

2008-07-22T10:49:00.003-06:00

Just in case you're up on the roof and can't make it down the stairs to reach one...

Sign

2008-07-20T10:02:00.002-06:00

If anything gets in your way, you are forbidden to ride it. You got it? None of this.

Dust

2008-06-17T15:38:00.002-06:00

It's everywhere. It's not something you can simply pick up and throw in the trash. A task that seems mundane but it most effective when dealing with dust, is vacuuming. Warning in advance though, if you haven't vacuumed for an extended period of time...the office in the Film Studies department is one such room that should come with a warning sign. The office looks fairly clean, with it's industrial blue carpet. As I began to vacuum the office, small puffs of dust came from the floor, proving that the room was not as clean as it looked. So much dust had accumulated, that each puff of dust was enough to reach my nose from the floor. Note to all those with carpet: Vacuum often, even when it doesn't look dirty. Unless you like sneezing, then you'll want to collect all the dust you can get! Don't worry, it's not hard to find and it doesn't take long. Where does dust come from anyway? It's not just dirt...what is it?

"We're Saving Money"

2008-06-13T23:06:00.002-06:00

Two offices in the Film Studies are connected to the same circuit. Between the two rooms are the following units requiring electricity: Three computers, a printer, a copier, a fax machine, lights on the ceiling, a refrigerator and a microwave. So many appliances to one circuit equals: Run the microwave and the copier at the same time, you lose all power.

Bathrooms - The Student Union

2008-05-27T13:52:00.002-06:00

If you travel to the basement, you will discover a small room at the back. Here are the fixtures of complete modernism. How can a sink, soap and drying be improved? By stuffing them all into one fixture. When you insert your hands into the hole in the wall, a portion of soap is distributed to your palms. Immediately after, water comes out. When the water shuts off, a dryer fires up. Convenient? Sure. And space saving, as well as decreasing waste of paper towels. But personal experience is as follows:
Shock, then glee at a new toy. Reading of instructions that are posted above each "sink". Inserting of hands into hole. Finding soap on hands, trying to rub it in, but water starts immediately washing the soap from hands before it does any good. The water came out quite forcefully, as to leave water all over my front. Removal of hands from near scalding water. Irritation at the continuing hot water, long after soap was removed. Finally, water shut off, and dryer started. Hot air dried hands quickly. Removal of hands and insertion of shirt to dry off. Utter amazement at such an absurd contraption, yet satisfaction at successfully navigating the new way to wash your hands.

Bathrooms

2008-05-27T13:30:00.004-06:00

Here begins a new series of in depth description of the campus restrooms. I must clarify that this observation is from the female point of view exclusively.

First of all, an overall observation of the bathrooms on campus. Each building is unique, and in turn have inspired unique rooms with toilets. It also depends on where in the building you choose to enter.

The "Bells"

2008-04-29T21:33:00.004-06:00

The sounds of bells, ring in the hour. Look up and around, yet there is no bell tower to be found. As you approach the student union building, the sound will grow louder. Look up once again, and lo and behold, the source of the sound is a loud-speaker on the wall. You will stand in awe of the ridiculously nonsensical point of ringing bells that exist elsewhere. Admittedly the sound is lovely and the intention is honest. But really. Come now. A speaker?

Garbage Moderator

2008-04-18T15:50:00.002-06:00

The garbage collector dresses in a white jumpsuit, hat, face-mask, and giant rubber gloves. He pulled up to the first garbage can outside the student center, and pulled it out. It was only 1/4 full, but he tossed in the back of his small car/cart, and inserted a new bag. 15 yards away sat the next can full of trash. He got back in the car, and drove to it. Pausing at a lunch table, he picked at something stuck in the wood with his big rubber gloves. It didn't budge, he flicked it, then left it alone. Again, the bag was only 1/4 full of trash, but he threw it in the back with the other nearly empty black bags. He replaced it with a new one, put the holding ring over the top, and set the lid on, lopsided.

Language and Communications

2008-04-18T15:09:00.000-06:00

I am aware that it has been said before that the organizational skills of the architect were significantly impaired. Today an adventure confirmed this accusation. Who in their right mind would make the 3rd floor of a building near unaccessible? It's almost a test of patience and endurance. "You may enter the realm of English and Writing, under the condition you are able to find the single elevator, or the two corner staircases that reach us."

Thankfully, my department is on the first floor. Much kinder. "Just turn left, but don't blink or you'll miss it" rather than an MIA threat. Yes, I will have to venture to the elusive 3rd floor on occasion, but that is only a minor component. This building is two words. A puzzle. Only for smart people. In other words, good luck. May the force of direction be with you.

The Library

2008-04-18T15:07:00.001-06:00

What exactly is the point of a library? You would think this is an insane proposition. You would probably say: "To hold books." But per my adventures this afternoon, my observations told me a whole new story.

First use: A construction site. A few weeks ago a friend of mine observed that the University should have a new mascot. The crane. The only way inside through the west doors. My entire experience here has consisted of half a library. Thankfully, it appears that work is being completed, but some parts of the library are uninhabitable due to the constant banging.

Second use: A fashion show. Oh wait. That goes for all of campus. Here comes Spring and the new summer fashions...all I have to say is, watch out.

Third use: Nap-time. Ten feet into the library and guaranteed you will find a dosing student. Whether it be a book they rest on, or a chair. Sometimes there are 3 or 4 sleeping people within eye-sight.

Fourth use: An exercise routine. The place is huge. Hundreds of shelves hold thousands of books. Forget your run of the mill Dewey Decimal system. This place adds a whole new level of organization! The government papers have an entire section to themselves (good riddance I say, keep the boring stuff out of the way.) Particularly, I was searching for books on Latin and Greek today. Somehow, even though I used the Quick Search, I ended up in the religion section. There were books in other languages, but that wasn't helpful. The language books are located a floor above and on the other side. I found the Greek books there looked around, then headed to where I was told books in Latin were. I ended up back in the religion section. Lugging my backpack back the other way, I found the Latin books 3 shelves away from the Greek. 4 trips us and down the stairs, and about 4 trips back and forth across the floors. With a backpack, who needs a treadmill and weights?

You never know what else a library will do for you. A place to check email, play online games, read Roald Dahl...or simply get lost and never return to civilization. Check out your local library and I bet you'll be pleasantly surprised!